Attack of the SIR
by Hyper Chibi Absol
Summary: SIR bots have been sent to destroy Zim. What will happen? Read to find out.


Here's another old fan fiction written in 2006. I've gotten many great reviews of this fan fiction on deviantART so I thought I'd post it here. :3

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Invader Zim : Attack of the SIR

_Today, as any other day, I stare up at the night sky thinking of a way to prove that I'm right. My mother always told me, before she died, that I should believe whatever I believe is true and no one could tell me otherwise. When she was alive I was happy because she would always stick up for me against others who scoffed at what I thought was real. One of these people was my father. He was the worst of them all. He hated my thoughts so much that he had classified me as 'insane'. That was what ignited the flame of my anger. But since no one would believe me I vowed to find proof, not only for myself but for my mother. I am Dib Membrane, a believer of the unknown._

It was a foggy morning in the cemetery where a boy could be seen carrying a rose. He wore a light blue shirt with a frowning face on it and a long black coat that matched his spiked, raven hair. He came up to a tombstone that read 'Here lies May Membrane 1964-1996'. As he placed the flower in front of the grave another boy walked up to him. He had green skin, wore a black wig and eye lenses to cover his red alien eyes along with a long maroon, striped shirt.

"Hello Dib-monkey." greeted the green boy.

Dib turned around to look at the boy who greeted him with an insult. He knew exactly who he was and wanted to prove to the world that the green boy, Zim, was an alien from Irk all along. So far he has failed at doing so.

"What do you want, Zim?" asked Dib angrily.

"I just wanted to ask you if you would give up trying to stop me, ZIM, from taking the hideous planet you call Earth." he replied.

"I can't believe you'd ask such a stupid question like that. I'd never give up trying to stop you!" he shouted.

"You do realize by now that no one will believe you, am I correct?" asked Zim.

"I don't care! I'm not going to break my promise to my mother for finding proof just so you can take over the planet!" Dib replied angrily.

"Fine. Have it your way. Your human stupidness of trying to eliminate me never ceases to amuse me, anyway." told Zim while walking off. "Good bye, Dib."

He watched Zim fade away into the distance as he walked home. Dib decided to head home as well. He knew he had to figure out some way to prove that Zim was an alien. But how? He opened the door to his house and stepped in to find his younger sister, Gaz, playing her Game Slave 2. This didn't surprise him at all. Everyone knows that she just loves to play video games, especially if they have to do with vampire piggies. In Gaz's appearance she had purple hair that spiked in the front that made her head seem square, a necklace with a skull carved from marble dangling from it, and a dark purple dress that was nearly black. Dib walked out of the living room and up the stairs to his room. He then locked the door and picked up a book from his desk that read '1000 ways to catch an alien' on the cover.

Back at Zim's house, Zim was in his training room so he could be prepared for anything that Dib could come up with. He used a simulation of him taking over Earth with holograms. With two plasma cannons, he zapped all of the holograms of Dib. Some came from the left. ZAP! Others came from the right ZAP! Zim defeated them with ease. He then smirked and laughed maliciously.

"Muahahaha!!!"

Just then a small, green dog with large eyes walked up to him.

"MASTER!!! Master! Master! Master!" he shouted while jumping up and down.

Zim turned around to see his small SIR named GIR. A SIR is the Standard-Issue Information Retrieval unit which could also be used as a thermos. GIR however is the only glitchy SIR known to exist and to also be assigned to on of the Irken soldiers to help them take over an enemy planet.

"What do you want now GIR? Can't you see I, ZIM, am busy?" asked Zim.

GIR held out his piggy bank.

"I want money to buy tacos but Mr. Piggy's empty!" explained GIR.

Zim slapped himself in the face with his hand from the embarrassment of him being interrupted for something so ignorant of GIR. He then dug in his pocket to see what little Earth money he had left to feed his little robot. Zim pulled out three dollars and seventy-two cents. GIR snatched the money out of his hand and ran to the front door to get his tacos from the nearest 'Crazy Taco'.

"You want anything?" he asked after opening the door.

"No, GIR. Now go get you tacos!" commanded Zim.

"YAY!!! TACO!!!" he exclaimed with glee.

Zim sighed in relief that his hyper and insane SIR was gone for the moment. He now had a chance to call the Almighty Tallest, whom which were the Irken royal leaders. They were the only known Irken soldiers to complete their mission and to grow into a Tallest, which every Irken alien wants to do. Zim typed in the Irk Mother ship's code to call them.

"Incoming transmission." stated a computerized voice.

"Let me guess..." told the red Tallest."It's Zim from planet Earth."

"Affirmative." answered the voice.

The purple Tallest came up to the red.

"I knew we should've sent him to Shnugo, the planet of beasts that eat big heads." said the purple Tallest.

"OK.... What does he want this time?" asked Red.

Zim appeared on the computer screen and waved to the Tallest.

"My Tallest, I have been studying my SIR's radiation and I think I have finally found a way to take over this planet. I can use it to thwart their plans of trying to escape or to try to stop me by making them stupider. I.... managed to try it on myself first and it works. GIR managed to send out his radiation with my bases power amplifier when it happened." stated Zim. "Is my plan not brilliant?!"

"Uh.... Sure Zim". answered Purple.

"Zim... if you found that out like months ago why haven't you tried to take over the planet?" asked Red.

"Well... Uh... It was just now that I thought about it." replied Zim.

"OK then... Can you go take over Earth then and stop calling us for a while. We're... We're very busy." told Red.

"Yes, sir!" answered Zim while saluting. "Invader Zim signing off."

The screen on the computer turned black as Zim ended his call. Red and Purple growled from the annoyance of Zim calling every day. This was the last straw. The Tallest Red then had an idea.

"Why don't we send the rest of the SIR to Zim? It would've worked the first time if the idiots at the post office got the addresses right." said Red.

"You mean the time when they were supposed to send the Megadoomer to Invader Tenn but Zim got it instead?" asked Purple. "She just got out of the hospital you know."

"Yeah but this time we'll make sure that the SIR will get sent to Earth this time." stated Red. "We'll have to activate them all and program them so that they travel here themselves."

"What?! Do you know how long that'll take?!" asked Purple.

"You want to get rid of Zim don't you?" asked Red. "So we have to do it."

They started their long and tedious work so that they could be rid of the little green menace once and for all. One by one the SIR flew all the way to planet Earth. As this was happening Dib was spying on Zim to see if he could get a picture of him without his disguise. A small round piece of metal then landed at his feet. Dib turned around to see what it was. The spherical metal then turned into a SIR. Its eyes glowed red and stared at Dib.

"GIR? Aren't you supposed to be with Zim?" asked Dib.

"My name is not GIR. I am SIR. Standard-Issue Information Retrieval unit." replied SIR.

"Then... You're another robot from Irk, right?" asked Dib.

"Affirmative." replied SIR.

Dib then got an idea. He thought of using the SIR to help him stop Zim and all his evil plots. He then picked up the tiny SIR and brought it home. Dib walked up to his room and locked the door as he did before.

"Where is our current location, human?" asked SIR.

"My room." answered Dib. "I'm going to download your information of the Irken race onto my computer. I need to know more about them if I'm going to stop them."

He took a large wire and plugged it into his computer and took the other end and plugged it into the SIR's head. The word 'download' appeared on the screen. Dib was very impatient to see what the SIR knew about the Irkens. Information in the Irken language came onto the screen which Dib could not read. He was frustrated that he thought he had a lead but it was something he couldn't understand.

"SIR, can you translate the Irken language to English so I can read it?" asked Dib. "I need to know the Irkens' weaknesses."

"Yes, but unfortunately it may take several hours." replied SIR.

"That's fine. As long as it gets translated I don't care how long it takes." stated Dib.

Dib unlocked the door to his room and walked downstairs so that he could watch his favorite show 'Mysterious Mysteries'. The little SIR that was Dib thought was going to translate the Irken language had other plans in mind. It sent a signal out to all of the other SIR that had been sent out to Earth. It then crawled out Dib's bedroom window and headed to Zim's house. GIR looked outside the window of Zim's house and saw what looked to be falling stars.

"Oooo!!" GIR cooed in interest.

"GIR! Get over here!" commanded Zim. "I have to take a sample of you 'stupid radiation' so I can use it on those FILTHY human!"

GIR walked over to Zim. He took a bottle and took out some of his radiation from GIR's head. Just then, they heard loud poundings on the front door. In curiosity, Zim walled up to the door and opened it. A sea of SIR units burst through the door. Zim backed up from the pile of robots and stuck the radiation bottle in his pocket. The SIR units stood up and tried to tackle Zim. He picked up a nearby plasma cannon and shot the SIR units that tried to come near him. He shot them all until only one was left standing.

"SIR, who sent you?" asked Zim angrily. "Why did you try to attack me?!"

"The Tallest sent us here." answered SIR.

"That's a lie! Why would they try to destroy me?" asked Zim.

"If you must know then you have to talk to them yourself." replied SIR. "If I were you I would go see them this very moment."

And with that the SIR unit jumped through the window, smashing it to pieces, and ran away. He and GIR then ran up to the docking bay to get into the Voot Cruiser, which was round, purple spaceship that Zim owned since he was a young alien smeet. He booted it up and then they followed the SIR unit that attacked them.

At Dib's house, Dib had just got done watching his show. He ran up to his room eagerly to check on the little SIR. He quickly opened the door to find the SIR missing. He looked under his bed and through all the openings he could've gotten through. He then felt a cold draft and then realized he must've gotten out through the window. Dib felt like an idiot for not locking it and knew he should've seen this coming. He ran outside to see if he could find it. Just then the Voot Cruiser could be seen flying through the sky near by. Dib tried to flag it down by waving franticly. GIR noticed him waving. The little robot grinned and waved back.

"HI, DIB!!!" greeted GIR loudly.

"Dib?" Zim asked while turning around. "Where?"

Zim looked around to find his rival. He then stopped the Voot Cruiser and set it into reverse. With a thunderous crash, Zim landed it right in front of Dib. Zim looked at DIB angrily.

"I don't have time for this, Dib!" Zim told him. "Now what do you want?!"

"Have you seen a little SIR run around?" asked Dib. "And I don't mean GIR.

"Yes. It just left." answered Dib.

"I need to get it back!" told Dib. "Now give me a ride!"

"What makes you think that I would ever let you ride in my ship?!" Zim asked, demanding an answer.

Dib took out a camera cell phone he had in his pocket and snapped a picture. He smirked and chuckled softly.

"That's why." answered Dib.

"Arrrgggg..... Get in." he commanded.

He jumped into the Voot Cruiser and sat right next to GIR. He then looked around to millions of tiny wires that each had something to do with keeping this ship afloat. He was surprised the GIR hadn't destroyed anything of it even at this point. He looked at his nemesis's robot. GIR smiled at him while squeaking his tiny stuffed moose plushie. After becoming bored with the petite automaton's enjoyment of something he thought to be so stupid he stared out the window to see nothing but stars and planets zooming past them as they flew through the vacuum of space.

"So... Where're we going?" asked Dib.

"The Irken mother ship. I need to speak to the tallest to see why they supposedly sent those SIR units to kill me." answered Zim.

They then approached a large reddish purple ship surrounded by smaller ships. After parking the Voot Cruiser, Zim stepped out and went to go talk to the Tallest. GIR and Dib followed him. They saw the SIR in front of Red and Purple.

"Zim! What are you doing here?!" asked Purple in shock.

"That SIR said you sent him any the others to eliminate me! Is that true?" asked Zim.

"Uh... Uh.." Red and Purple mumbled unable to answer.

"You... Did didn't you?!" asked Zim demanding an answer.

"Well if you hadn't called us so much and destroyed half of Irk maybe we wouldn't of tried to."answered Red.

Zim became enraged and tackled Red to the floor and struck him in the face multiple times. He knocked him off and called for the SIR to attack him. The main SIR unit revealed the head-mounted rocket-launchers and machine guns kept inside of its head and tried to shoot Zim. The other SIR attacked him with their circular saw-blades and energy blasts from their eyes. Zim tried to dodge them. GIR then pulled up a force field to help protect him. After that he attacked the other SIR units with his rocket-launchers and machine guns.

"Master! Get out of here!" he commanded. "You too Dib!"

"But what about you?" asked Zim.

"Forget about me. Just go!" he commanded.

Zim hesitantly ran away as he watched his robot fight the other SIR. Dib followed him only to be caught by an Irken grunt. Two other grunts caught Zim shortly after. It wasn't long before GIR was over powered by the ten other SIR that pounded him to the ground. Zim could barely watch as his metallic friend was being thrown at the wall, cut, and shot all with missiles.

"SIR! That's enough! Take him to the deactivation room to be disassembled. " stated Red. "As for Zim and the human... throw them in the prison cell!"

The Irken grunt drug them off and did what they were told. They opened the barred door and threw them in the cell. After doing so the closed and locked the door to contain them in it for an undetermined amount of time.

"Ya know Zim you were never supposed to be an invader and this never would've happened if you had just stayed on Food Courtia." stated Purple.

"Yeah. But you just want to be an invader which you could never be!" Red said while laughing. "You're such a loser."

And with that they left them to rot in the cell forever. Zim fell to his knees and clenched his fist in a mixed emotion of anger and sorrow.

"I should have never trusted them... because I did... GIR's gone now because of it..." Zim said sadly.

"Zim..." Dib said with concern.

"I was never meant to be an invader..." Zim admitted.

Zim walked over to the corner of the cell. It wasn't long before he broke down and started to sob. To him he was a total failure and he no longer had any friends. Dib walked up to Zim and rested his hand on his shoulder.

"Zim... It's OK. We all make mistakes... we just have to learn from them." Dib told.

"Learning something won't help us now. We're doomed to spend the rest of our lives in this cell!" Zim exclaimed.

Dib became angry and smacked Zim hard in the face. His cheek turned red and stung with pain.

"Zim, we can't give up now! You would never give up before, so why now?" asked Dib angrily. "GIR would of helped you if you were in this kind of trouble wouldn't he?"

"He would..." Zim answered with a nod. "But... I'm not as brave like him at all... Most times he seems fearless... especially when happy... If I were to be like him I'd need more courage, but I have none..."

"I'll be your courage." Dib told him.

"Thank you." thanked Zim.

They both started to look for a way out. They found a vent high above the floor. Zim extended the spider legs out of his backpack in order to climb up to it. Dib hung on to his back as they both climbed up. Dib kicked in the vent's covering and crawled in. Zim followed. Explosions and gunshots could be heard in the distance. He removed the other vent covering and slipped out along with Zim.

"Hey!" shouted one Irken grunt.

"Get back here!" shouted another as he started to chase them.

Dib grabbed Zim by the arm and started to run in the other direction. Zim panicked and started to look through his pocket for something to throw at the grunts in order to slow them down. He took out a bottle that had some of GIR's 'stupid radiation' in it.

"That's it! GIR's radiation!" Zim thought.

Zim tossed the glowing, blue bottle at the Irkens. It landed at their feet and exploded. They both fell and twitched with a drunken look on their faces. He knew that would hinder them useless for a few minutes. They ran away only to be stopped by two other Irken grunts. Both Zim and Dib were forced into the corner of the corridor. The Irkens charged up their plasma cannons and prepared to fire. A gunshot fired and knocked the plasma cannon out of one of Irkens' hand. The same happened to the other Irken. A shadowy figure came from the direction where the gunshots were fired. It formed into a cat-like body with red eyes.

"That's Mimi..." stated Dib.

"But if Mimi's here... That means...!" Zim exclaimed while unable to finish.

A young female Irken followed Mimi while walking with her spider legs. Her antennae were curled, she had large, purple eyes, and wore Elite Irken clothing.

"It's Tak!" exclaimed both Zim and Dib.

The Irken grunts raced toward their plasma cannons but Mimi quickly bolted to them and swallowed them whole. With the two grunts unarmed, Tak easily threw them into the cell where Zim and Dib were held.

"Well! That was easy!" said Zim happily.

"Easy for me!" corrected Tak. "You two would've been dead by now if it weren't for me and Mimi!"

"You're right. Thanks for helping us." thanked Zim.

"Uh.. You're welcome, Zim." Tak replied. "Zim... are you yourself right now? You seem different. I mean, you normally don't thank people."

"I'm just trying to be a better Irken." Zim told her. "But enough of the thanking. We have to find GIR and the Tallest. Those lie... lying... lyingness tallest! May doom rain on them!!"

"Then we'll have to get GIR first." said Tak. "But we have to hurry! He's in serious danger."

After she had stated that fact Zim bolted to the room where they were keeping him. Tak and Dib could barely keep up with him. Zim was running as if his own life was in peril. To him, if he lost GIR he would have nothing left to live for. Zim burst through the door and pulled out two plasma cannons that he had before to shoot any grunts or SIR that got in his way. He then ordered Dib and Tak to get GIR so they could get him somewhere safe. Soon after, Zim cornered Red and Purple. There was no where for them to run. He unsheathed the spider legs in his back pack and scratched Red's face hard with the sharp end of the left, front limb. He then lunged at Purple and jabbed him in the stomach with the right.

"Stop!!" cried a voice.

Zim halted the next blow he was about to make. Purple held his stomach in pain and Red spat out his two front teeth along with some blood. He desperately wanted to massacre them but the voice that called out told him otherwise. Zim then turned around to find out exactly who would dare to tell him what he should do. It was his tiny robot friend GIR, unharmed but also unhappy. Zim quickly retracted his spider legs and ran up to GIR with a smile on his face.

"GIR... You're OK." he said happily.

"That was a bad thing you did master!" he scolded.

Zim was speechless for a moment then apologized for the unneeded violence. Soon after they heard an alarm blaring through out the ship. The Tallest led the way to the SIR control room. It was worse than they thought. They no longer had control over the SIR.

"Warning! Danger! Danger! SIR unit power draw critical! Ship will self-destruct in twenty minutes! Everyone on board must evacuate!" warned the computerized voice.

"We have to shut down the main power supply to turn the SIR units off!" suggested Purple. "That'll permanently keep them in a suspended state and stop them from draining the ship's power."

"Wait... If you shut off the SIR's main power supply then... GIR and Mimi will be sent into that suspended state as well." stated Zim. "I won't do that to them."

"So you're just gonna let us all die because of those robots?!" asked Red in shock. "Idiot!"

GIR frowned at what he heard. Everyone was going to die because of him. Mimi felt the same. The guilt of having an entire ship full of people killed just because of two robots was too great. They both ran up to the giant power switch and tried to pull it down to 'off'.

"GIR!!" exclaimed Zim.

"Mimi!!" exclaimed Tak.

"Good bye... master." he told him. "I love you..."

A tear ran down from GIR's metallic cheek from knowing that he was going to die doing something right. With one great pull, the switch was set to the off position and the energy of all the activated SIR returned to the mother ship. With only seconds to spare the self-destruction was aborted. GIR's lifeless body fell to the floor along with Mimi's. Zim ran and picked up GIR.

"W-why... why did you do that?" he asked with tears in his eyes. "GIR... I-I'm so sorry..."

He held the little robot close to him hoping for a miracle would happen to bring his friend back. Tak came up to him and told him that GIR was really gone. Zim didn't want to believe it. He couldn't. Ever since the Great Assigning GIR had always been with him. He was with him all the time. Good and bad.

"GIR please... just come back..." he begged."Come back..."

A tear ran down his cheek and dripped on GIR's face. The tiny robot sparked once and started to dimly light up. He slowly opened his eyes to see his master crying for him.

"Master? Master don't cry." he told him.

"G-GIR?" asked Zim. "GIR!!"

Zim was overjoyed to see his friend come back to life. Mimi started to wake up shortly after. Tak, just like Zim, was overjoyed as well to see her ally alive. Purple and Red looked at them puzzled.

"But... The power was turned off. How can they still be on?" asked Purple.

"I... don't know." answered Red.

"Meh... What does it matter?" asked Purple.

"Yeah. I guess as long as it happened it's OK." stated Red.

It was almost midnight now so Zim decided to head back home. Dib got into the back of the Voot Cruiser so Zim could take him back to Earth. With a loud crash he landed it and Dib stepped out.

"Well... I guess I'll see you tomorrow, Zim." stated Dib.

"Yeah." he replied. "Hey! You're not going to show that picture you took of me to the Earth authorities are you?! I gave you a rid and you had your chance to grab that SIR!"

Dib thought for a moment and shook his head. After what he has been through he knew that his mother saw him up in heaven and that would've been enough proof for the both of them. He walked up quietly to his room and locked the door to go to sleep so he would be ready for his next adventure.

~The End~


End file.
